I’ve been doom-scrolling a lot recently. Putting off dealing with the current crappy situation I’m faced with and getting lost in the TikTok algorithm. This is an unhealthy way to spend my time, but maybe something has come of it. The other night I came across two videos which got me seriously thinking about where I stand and who I am.
The first was about the responsibility we have to ourselves. From the moment you’re born, you’re handed a responsibility – yourself. No instructions, no manual, just a life that belongs entirely to you. And yet, most people spend their time looking outward, waiting for someone else to take charge, to provide direction, to care.
But here’s the truth: you are the caretaker of your own existence. No one else is under contract to do the job for you. You’re the one making the calls, whether you realize it or not. And if you don’t? If you neglect that responsibility? The consequences pile up – self-doubt, exhaustion, toxic relationships, a life that feels like it’s happening to you rather than something you’re actively shaping.
Loving yourself isn’t about warm, fuzzy feelings. It’s not about waiting until you “deserve” it. It’s a process, a set of deliberate actions, a daily commitment. You don’t have to like yourself to start treating yourself with care. Liking yourself comes later, after showing up for yourself in ways that matter.
The mistake so many make is assuming love is a feeling that just appears. It’s not. It’s work. It’s choosing, every single day, to act in your own best interest. And if you don’t? No one is coming to do it for you. This job has always been yours. Time to start taking it seriously.
The second video was about being kind to your future kids. The difference between being kind to your present kids and being kind to your future kids is one of the hardest lessons in parenting.
Right now, your kids want McDonald’s, unlimited YouTube, and to stay up way past bedtime. Saying yes makes them happy in the moment. They get what they want, no tantrums, no complaints – just instant gratification. That feels like kindness.
But real kindness isn’t just about right now. It’s about setting them up for later. Being kind to your future kids means they eat real food, get enough sleep, and learn to entertain themselves without a screen. It means they grow into healthier, happier, more capable people—because you gave them the structure they needed, even when they didn’t want it.
It’s the difference between easy and right. The easy choice is to give in. The right choice is to think ahead. The kid who whines about vegetables today is the same kid who benefits from good health tomorrow. The one complaining about bedtime now is the one who will thrive with well-rested focus later.
Parenting isn’t about making your kids happy in every moment. It’s about preparing them for a future where they can be happy, healthy, and independent – because you were kind enough to do the hard thing when they needed it most.
And that’s when it clicked. I do this to myself. I don’t show myself care, and I prioritise present me over future me. I procrastinate, push things to tomorrow. I tell myself that ‘I’ll start next week’, or that ‘I’ll do that tomorrow’. This is not being kind to future me. That has to stop. I need to interrupt the cycle of putting things off. It means not putting things off until they become overwhelming. It means not burying my head in the sand. It means making choices today that make tomorrow easier.
I have so much stuff to sort out. So much to do on behalf of future me. I need to make a start on that… tomorrow.
