Moving Forward

Al·
General
·1 min read

There comes a time in your life when you need to really think about what you are going to do and whether it is healthy to continue to do what it is that you are doing at that time. Is that time now? There comes a time when you need to realise that life is not forever and that every minute counts. When you realise this you reach the understanding that you cannot waste these valuable minutes as they are irreplacable. . .

So, from tomorrow, it’s a new me, a new Alan, a new outlook on life, a new way of living. I will live each day like it is my last, I will not wallow in the past. I will look forward to my life and spending it with someone who appreciates me and loves me like I will love them.

I think I have found that person.

She is funny, she is clever, she makes me laugh, she makes me smile, she makes me want to be with her, I think about her all day every day.

Time to move forward. Forget the past. Forget the mistakes I have made. Forget the failed relationships. Forget the people who are no good for me. Forget the people who bring out the negatives in me and love the people who bring out the positives in me.

Here’s to the future.

6 Comments

  2. I don’t know about you, but I personally believe it takes a lot more to really change a person than one would think… Oh well. Have fun, and all that.

    Reply

  3. Indeed.
    I firmly believe this from first hand experince & witnessing others first hand in the same predicament. I see the general behaviours we have all done at least one in the past being part of some continuum. Imagine your total current behaviour patterns as something circular whatever you are doing now you will do again at some point because it is part of your current set of behaviour. No way of putting what are likely to be alot of new ideas more concisely…
    Why things are part of your behaviour & why others are not could be argued to be a complex play-off between your inherited emotional responses, reinforced emotional responses, (those that you have aquired through experience & taking on others experiences), & the brains resourcefulness & drive to seek pleasure & more inportantly to avoid distress by preventing you from doing things that are likely to bring you pain.
    It is extremely dedicated to this task. More power to it also. What purpose would it serve if it were to be reprogrammed to do the opposite? You would have an individual that would die in torment surely. Or would you?

    You see the problem with the brain is that it is applying survival & behavioural strategies that saved our butts when we were vulnerable, resourceless, unlikely survival prospects in the middle of an (at best) indifferent wilderness.
    Just thinking through how you would avoid pain & ensure pleasure in that enviroment brings forth at least one uncanny realisation:
    Means of dealing with the environment day to day that would have guaranteed me avoiding suffering then is now redundant & thwarting my ability to capitalise on absurdly less life-threatening risk taking that is essential to my furtherment in a modern world.

    The risks have changed. The emotions have not.
    Your inability to move outside COMPLETELY of your ‘safe’ existance (it IS safe – no harm will come to you, you are guaranteed a safe, harm free life to your very end) is because your brain is wheighing up the giving up of this guaranteed existance for something completely different as potentially a bad gamble. Of course it’s odds are off because it considers the alternative could result in death or incapacity to operate & find sustenace shelter defend oneself etc. It is not programmed with potential outcomes like, ‘a bit of egg on my face’ & ‘people who I want to impress will laugh at me for trying etc’.
    So getting out of your ‘set’ pattern requires something dramatic. Dramatically more powerful than the perceived risk of taking on a life-threatening change.

    I have simplified what can admitedly be very complex emotio-evolutionary processes here, & have not included the other element that we as social creatures are ‘primed’ to respond to, against our better judgement or otherwise, the Social Impetus. This is poweful because again, at some point in our emotional development taking actions that would have us rejected from the group could iniate situations that were terminal.
    If served no one to be out of favour with their group for things were far more unpredictable & there were no other organisations you could turn to for help.

    So to conclude, gestures of a desire to change are all to easy to employ, ‘today I will go left instead of right here, that is a change’, ‘I will stop wearing grey clothes that will be a change’ etc. etc. mere tokens. Quite likely are your poor rational brain justifying your absolute stasis in reply to conditions which reasonably demand the integrating of a new routine, which would lead to a point where current actions will *not* likely be revisited at some point in the future.
    In short the routine you have actually changes in significant ways. Your days in the future bear little or no semantic relation to the ones in the past.

    Of course I would argue that it is only traumatic external events that lead to the instant break from routine into completely new routine. For example leaving your country & heading out elsewhere due to an internal trauma or insurmountable external influences.

    It is more common for our circular routines to expand before they lead to the pruning of old activities & the absorption of new ones, which in turn is where we see the net significant change.

    BTW – Emotions form the underlying mechanism by which evolutionary behavioural programming is passed on & developed over time in a species. Psychologists also now clear on how many, if not all, of our decisions infact take place within the emotional centre of our being, & are then subsequently rationalised by the conscious analytical centre. By interpreting external events as ‘evidence’ of our courses of action & putting together argument for our ‘choices’.

    Reply

  4. Wait, wait… “Wez Alka” is really Mullet Man, isn’t he?

    I had more, on-topic stuff written up here, but I closed the browser window on accident, so fuck you.

    Reply

  6. In retrospect what I considered a positive kick-start there was doomed to be pretty futile.
    I tried to throw a bone, but sadly when it comes to wisdom, the dog has to starve to death before he realises that what was before him was infact, a bone; too bad.
    Perverse is the cosmos.

    Reply

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